It seems to me that, even in our progressive world in which I struggle to keep up with what seems to be an ever-lengthening list of possible gender identities, we still don't feel comfortable talking about the M word. Menopause. I don't understand why that is. I'm not one to go into gory detail - nobody's got time for that except surgeons and serial killers. But there are things I've experienced that no one told me about. And, at 56 and still in perimenopause, you would have thought I'd have oodles of friends who've gone all the way through willing to share their stories. We all love to share our labor and delivery tales - I know I've got mine at the ready, even though my kids are now adults. Why can't we talk a little more freely about this part of our lives? I know all about hot flashes. I had them at least hourly until my physician made a slight adjustment to one of my medications (another thing I didn't know could happen). But no one mentioned cramps that make my toes spontaneously twist like gnarled old trees. That's fun. Nor did anyone mention restless leg syndrome which has me flopping like a fish all night. In fact neither of those things is mentioned on WebMD nor the Mayo Clinic sites. Although they do mention thinning hair and loss of breast fullness. Yay. So I'm sharing, avoiding the more intimate details here, because I think we shouldn't be shy about helping each other through this weird time of life. I wonder if guys would be more open about sharing such things if they happened to them. And maybe I'm just in the wrong conversations. I do tend to hang out with younger folks. Lord knows, my kids know most of the details of what coming out the other side of child-bearing years entails. There is a celebration of sorts when you pass through puberty. Not so much 30 or 40 years down the road. And for all the decades-long complaining we do about our periods there should be a big fat party when we're done. I'm not quite there yet, but maybe I'll throw one. Assuming I can stand on my gnarled old toes.
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d.a.meek
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December 2017
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