So, you have a child and born with him are imaginings of who that pudgy little bundle might become one day. And, because you have no other real reference, you start with the path you took. A word of caution to those with real young ones - hold on to those dreams loosely. My oldest is about to turn 21; my youngest is 18 (God knew two were all I could handle). My path to 21 included captaining high school sports teams, graduating and going directly into college - knowing what I wanted to be when I grew up - and joining a sorority. My husband's was similar, exchanging sports for arts (and the sorority for a fraternity - though he might have enjoyed the sorority house). My kids' paths are markedly different. My son is taking a break from college after two years to reassess what he really wants to do. We've discussed what that break could look like - just working, joining the military or doing service work domestically or internationally. My daughter, who graduated high school early, has her sights set on just one college with an incredibly tight admission rate and average age of first year students at just over 20 years old. So, while my husband and I couldn't wait to fly the coop, it looks like my kids will be around a while. And, the truth is, so many kids who go straight into college end up back home for years anyway because they can't find a job. I think it's telling that the Affordable Care Act allows kids to stay on their parents health insurance plans - even without being students - until they're 26 years old. The Feds raised the full Social Security retirement age from 65 to 67 for folks born in 1960 or later, so more seniors are staying employed, reducing opportunities for the young workforce. Or, those seniors lost their shirts multiple times in market crashes so they can't afford to retire. My point is, you can guide your child along in their younger years and even through the treacherous teens. And while everyone cautions their youth will pass in the blink of an eye, a lot can happen in 18 years. So whatever you think the world might hold for them as they blow out that first birthday candle, don't be surprised by the way things are when they toss their graduation cap. I would really like to meet the folks whose kids became exactly what their parents had imagined. And then I could ride off into the sunset on my unicorn.
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d.a.meek
Young at heart. Archives
December 2017
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